Reviewed:
This story is an interesting variation of the Cowboys vs. Indians type of western in that it is from the point of view of the Indians. The plot is great and does a good job of sucking you in all while keeping you on your toes with new developments.
Technically there are quite a few spelling and grammar errors and they can at times be distracting. It isn’t nearly as bad as some of the stroke stories out there so don’t let it be the reason you avoid the story. With a good editor it could be cleaned up pretty easily.
For readers with violence or rape squicks this story isn’t going to be up your alley. If you’ve read many westerns you’ve probably read at least a few that reference settler women being captured by the Indians. This story gives you a look at what happens to them from the captors point of view. There are also several parts of the story that involve the torturing of enemies of the Cheyenne that are described quite graphically.While these aren’t issues for me personally, I understand it may lower the appeal of the stories for others so it seems relevant to emphasize it. The spelling and grammar issues aside, overall the story is still a good read thus the high appeal score.
Reviewed:
I recommend this story, but with reservations. That isn't supposed to be a joke about Indian Reservations. Its long, perhaps a little too long. Towards the end I was eager to see how it ended and then was a little disappointed because it didn't end, it just stopped. It has lots of violence and some Sadism and Masochism. Its an alternate world story that starts about 1839 and stops in the early 1850s.
There is heroism, the hero does some heroic things and some less than heroic things. I am not certain how true to life the Cheyenne culture that was presented is. There are some good lines, ones that amused was about how handling ten wives was a lot like handling six, only it takes longer.
One of the big reservations I had about the story is the Technical Quality. Lots of wrong words like wither for writhe. Some homonyms and misspellings. If you can stand the relatively low technical score the story flows nicely and lots of interesting things happen. Considerable sex, and not just the hero and his wives. I gave Technical Quality a five, which is like getting a D in school. I gave the plot an 8, which is an A. Lots of things happen, sometimes surprises without much foreshadowing or notice. What happens next is always interesting.
The Appeal to the Reviewer score was going to be a nine, that's what I voted the story, but upon reflection I deleted a point for the ending as the story stopped without any real resolution and Technical Quality issues an editor, or even just a proofreader could fix to make the story much better. It is still a good story, eight is an A, and if you have an interest in alternate universe or western stories, particularly about Indians, this would be a good story to read. Plan at least a day or so to get through it, unless you read a lot faster than I do.
Reviewed:
Well I can see a sequel here. I do hope TRix gets a hold of a better proofreader/editor. The story was a lot better prepared than others he has written. Technically it was just ok, numerous homonyms and several punctuation and grammer errors but overall not too bad.
This story is believable only in the "alternate universe" and as such it is what it is....fiction.
The story line is really good, the situations in which the hero finds himself are believable, even to the point of "harem".
The story is straight forward without any twists and should be a quick read.